Personal Perils Create Pearls

A woman shared this devotional in our Bible Study:


         "For many women, wearing jewellery is part of personal adornment. Throughout the centuries women have worn rings, earrings and bracelets made of gemstones and precious metals. If you have ever stopped and looked at the display cases in a jewellery store you know that these things cost a considerable amount of money! The pearl is one such precious stone, which in many ways portrays the Christian life.
Pearls are formed inside a living creature - an oyster. They are formed as the result of a fascinating biological process. Occasionally a foreign substance slips into the oyster's inner body and cannot be expelled. It's like the oyster gets a splinter. To protect itself from the foreign substance, the oyster covers the irritant with layers of the same substance that is used to create the shell. Over many years this forms a beautiful pearl.
As we travel our way into the future and ultimately to the New Jerusalem there is much to be learned from the formation of a pearl. Each of us is like a precious pearl in the eyes of the Lord. We are woven together like a beautiful necklace. But how do we get formed into what we are and shall be? The sufferings and tribulations that we experience are irritants that cause us considerable discomfort, but, as Paul reminds us in Romans 5, they are producing something beautiful. Those irritants are what make us into a precious pearl. And where are we formed? The church of the Lord Jesus is our "oyster."  In the community of God's people we face perils and tribulation. Yet when those irritants are surrounded with the shell of the gospel they become something precious.
We can rejoice in the hope of eternal glory. When faced with tribulation and suffering, know that God is making a pearl. We can "glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope." (Romans 5:3) May that adjust our expectations and attitude. Our identity is not defined by what we achieve, but by what we have become- a precious pearl in the necklace of Christ."












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I have also added a new blog to my blog list  called "For Your Tomorrow."
It is a new blog written by Tim Challies' sister. Maryanne writes in such a comforting, encouraging way. I have learned a lot from her already. I would love to have a nice, warm cup of tea with her.

the dentist and the apology

It was time to make that call; a call that I dreaded making. Visiting the dentist was something that I managed to put off. Very easily. Too many hours of my childhood were spent restrained in the dentist chair trying to straighten my crooked teeth. I also avoided the dentist when I was pregnant and had a baby- which pretty much sums up the past ten years. Now with a painful, aching tooth I knew that I couldn't put off that appointment any longer.
This afternoon I found myself laying in the cold, sterile dentist chair. I told myself how great it felt to lay there and not feel one bit guilty for not moving. That warm, lazy feeling quickly vanished when I saw the dental assistant slip the dentist "the needle". I know that they try to make the pass so the patient cannot see the incoming needle, but there is no way to disguise something so long, sharp, and shinny. I closed my eyes and attempted to imagine myself gardening in a beautiful, blooming flower bed that was free of poison ivy. I was again jolted back to reality as my mouth filled up. I desperately needed to swallow but there was no graceful way to swallow with a big rubber thing forcing my mouth wide open. To top it off my right cheek was drooping in a lopsided way from the anesthetic. Staring into the mirror above my head I vainly tried to spot any runaway drool but the dentist's hands were in the way. Feeling vulnerable and embarrassed I resigned myself to the fact that it was going to take some pain and humility to rid myself of the tooth ache and receive a good cleaning.
I began to think of the ladies' bible study in our church. We have been studying "Pursuing Peace" by Robert Jones and the morning's discussion dealt with the proper and Biblical way of apologizing. This is the kind of apologizing that reflects wisdom and the author gave a list outlining the vital characteristics of an effective confession.

The "Seven A's of Confession"
1. Address everyone involved....The circle of confession must be as big as the circle of the offense. Consider who witnessed your sin and who has suffered because of your sin.
2. Avoid "if", "but", "maybe"...True confessions leave no room for doubt. By saying "if" you show that you really don't care how you hurt someone and your desire is to quickly resolve it in order to move on. "But" confessions fail to accept full responsibility and shift the blame by not taking ownership of the offense.
3. Admit specifically...Specific confession shows thoughtfulness, sincerity and sorrow. It sets a specific agenda for change.
4. Acknowledge the hurt...This means expressing sorrow for the way our sin has made life hard for the other person. You are not sorry for getting caught but instead you show regret for the hurt that my sin has had on the other person.
5. Accept the Consequences..This demonstrates our sincerity and shows the offended person that we are not asking forgiveness merely to avoid consequences. True repentance may require the repentant one to suffer the just consequences of his wrong choices. It might entail a loss of privileges or possessions and another consequence could be that the other person may be slow or even unwilling to forgive us.
6. Alter your behaviour...Explain how you intend to alter your behaviour. This involves being active in developing, voicing, and carrying out a plan to change our behaviour.
7. Ask for forgiveness and allow time...Asking does not mean demanding. Deep wounds are painful so allow time for the offended  to go to God asking for grace and wisdom.

I dreaded the dentist, just like I dread making an apology. I can put it off as long as possible, but the hurt will still be there, and the rot will only go deeper. I felt embarrassed and humbled as the dentist scrapped away the "bad stuff" and I listened intently as she gave me an action plan so that I could avoid this pain in the future. Apologizing demands humility and a heart determined to follow God's leading.
As I left the office, I felt lighter, happier, and relieved. A sincere apology can restore, revive, and replenish our relationships with God and others.

*the Seven A's of Confession can also aid us as we confess our sins to God
**"Pursuing Peace: A Christian's Guide for Handling Our Conflicts" by Robert D. Jones is a must read.

BOOKS

                                        

* Here is the winter newsletter that I put together on behalf of our library committee for the members of our church. The topic... Books For Men

 

Books to challenge and equip you where God has placed you:

 “Disciplines of A Godly Man” by Kent Hughes  “An outstanding book devoted to the practical outworking of discipline on subjects like purity, marriage, prayer, the tongue, the mind, our work, leadership, ministry and many more.”

“What Every Man Wishes His Father Had Told Him” by Byron Forrest Yawn  “Discover afresh the masculinity that pleases God, enriches marriages, and makes fatherhood the most rewarding occupation you’ll ever know.”

“The Hole in Our Holiness” by Kevin DeJong  “A book for those who are ready to take holiness seriously, ready to be more like Jesus, ready to live in light of the grace that produces godliness. This is a book about God’s power to help us grow in personal holiness and to enjoy the process of transformation.”

“A Neglected Grace: Family worship in the Christian Home” by Jason Helopoulos  “It is our joyful responsibility to lead our home in worshipping the Lord. In the history of the church, family worship has been one of the Christian family’s strongest characteristics. This is a wise, realistic, gospel-motivated (rather than guilt-driven) guide.”

“Finally Free: Fighting for Purity with the Power of Grace” by Heath Lambert   The author identifies eight strategies, each based on the work of Christ, that give people locked in the grip of pornography both the fuel and the road map for change. Each chapter is grounded in grace and clearly articulates how to apply the gospel in practical ways. This book has been highly recommended by many including David Murray and Tim Challies. Whether you struggle yourself or are trying to help someone who struggles there is good news. Jesus Christ can, will, and does set people free from the power of pornography.

“Beyond Ordinary” by Justin and Trisha Davis  “The authors know all too well the dangers of settling for an ordinary marriage. Their own failure to recognize the warning signs almost resulted in the end of their marriage. They share the invaluable lessons they learned that helped them restore their relationship and transform their ordinary marriage into an extraordinary one. They praise God for breathing new life into a marriage that seemed to have reached the end.”

Books for your enjoyment and edification:

“Walking from East to West: God in the Shadow” Ravi Zacharias’ autobiography

“Sons of Hamas” by Mosab Hassan Yousef

“John MacArthur: Servant of the Word and Flock” a biography by Iain Murray

“The Conviction To Lead: 25 Principles for Leadership That Matters” By Albert Mohler

“Amazing Dad: Letters from William Wilberforce to his Children”

Books by Eric Metaxas: “Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy”  -   “Amazing Grace: William Wilberforce and the Heroic Campaign to end Slavery”  -  “7 Men and the Secret of their Greatness”

our cheerful little Caleb

Our cheerful little Caleb is a delight to our family. He quietly observes the comings and goings of our household and gives a big grin to his older brothers when they entertain him with their silly antics. He was one of our earliest walkers and caused many gasps when this little, bald, toothless babe came running into a room. We laughed at peoples astonished responses.

This is the first time that we have had a little one in the house with siblings being that much older. We have been able to watch the older brothers tenderly play with him, cheer at Caleb's accomplishments, and proudly show him off to strangers.We have also had to make new rules. "Only one boy in the playpen at a time with Caleb, do not take him out of his crib unless you ask first, and even though he is giggling when you twirl him around and around, when you let go he will topple over and bump his head." Just like all one year olds, Caleb has a little sensor that goes off as soon as the bathroom door has been left open. In two days we went through eleven rolls of toilet paper. We now have another rule. "Whomever leaves the bathroom door open has to clean up the aftermath." Now, for the most part, that problem has been solved. The boys fight over who can feed him his breakfast and bottle. When I suggested that there are diapers to be changed as well, they fled the room plugging their noses. 

There have been many opportunities to watch daddy plow the snow off of the driveway this winter!

 Ever since there have been little people in the home, the Christmas tree has been a no-go. This year we decorated a tree with branches out of reach for little curious hands.

One winter evening, I was reading to the three middle boys by the fireplace and Nate was sprawled out on the couch reading his own book. Caleb took his little rocking chair and dragged it into the middle of the room. He found a "big person's book" opened it up and started to "read." This was heart warming to watch but it also served as a lesson for all of us. He sees the good things and imitates that- but he also sees the bad things, hears the harsh tones and unkind words that might be spoken. Little ones imitate their older siblings. Children imitate their parents. What a responsibility for us as parents!

                                         We love our little guy with his sparkling blue eyes!

the humbled parent

Way back when, I had begun a grocery shopping trip when a totally obnoxious toddler came bounding in with his harried parents. He was told to stay in the grocery cart, only to climb out within seconds. His parents then told him to hold onto their hand and that never happened. The little guy provided entertainment to other shoppers as he randomly threw items in their cart. Me, I am embarrassed to say that I  shook my head with much judgement. This boy needed some good firm disciplining. At the check out this family was hurriedly packing their groceries and failed to notice that their toddler slipped out the doors as I was exiting. I grabbed the little guy and very firmly grasped his shoulder, the pressure spot that makes your knees fold. In a low voice I forcefully told him to listen to his mom and dad and not to run away again. The boy didn't flinch. I turned around and smiled as I passed him to his parents explaining that he tried to get out of the store and I caught him. They thanked me and off I went, shaking my head once again. 

And then.... a few years later we had a boy. A boy that caused me to eat my words and taught me a lesson of humility. From the time of infancy, I had grocery tellers close their lanes and help me pack my groceries just to get me and my screaming bundle out of the store. After a year the screaming stopped and he showed his incredible talent of undoing any latch, lock, or belt that he was strapped into. Since he had no fear, taking a leaping jump out of a cart was totally possible. Buying groceries became sort of nightmarish. I was at a point that I was ready to have the rest of the family starve then bring him into the store with me. Something had to change so I managed to do groceries and other errands around Adam's schedule. We held onto hope that he would outgrow this stage and we could have some fun outings as a family. Fast forward two years and we are still hoping that he will outgrow this stage. A few weeks ago, Adam took him on errands and this little guy with fast feet took off when Adam was paying the cashier. Adam could see the clothes racks moving and knew that he had to move fast to catch him. Soon numerous people were helping Adam and calling our little guy's name. Finally a kind lady caught him and passed him back to Adam. When Adam was relating this story, I said "he could of been kidnapped!" The older boys were quick to respond that whoever kidnapped him, would spend one day with him and then return him...they have had too many of their crafts, legos, and toys broken or stolen.

We have decided that the best thing to do is keep him at home. Adam and I take turns going to social events, bazaars, breakfasts. It just works better. It is sort of like glorified-house arrest. Going to church is manageable, he does well at his cousin's homes, and thankfully we have lots of stop-in company that makes it all very doable. He is most content here at home and that is a good thing.

In the midst of raising him,we have learned many valuable lessons (besides wanting to invent a leash and a muzzle for little boys that take off).

A man from our church who had a difficult child to raise told me to remember two things. God has created him. He knows him and cares for him. And another thought, a terrifying thought, that God saw it best for us to be his parents. God ordained this before creation! As I pondered these two statements, I felt very reassured and hopeful.

Since that conversation I have also realized that God is continually stretching us and making us dependent on Him. That gives Him glory. I have learned that raising this little guy is an opportunity to glorify God. God has humbled me and has given me much empathy for struggling parents. I get it. All of the way.

We are blessed that we have grandparents and great-grandparents who love him and pray for him. Aunts and uncles and friends (especially those who have older children - thank you Christine!) are a huge help to us. Extra eyes are always welcomed!

Our curious, fun-loving guy loves being at home and is content to stay at home (with the exception of taking off to grandma and grandpa's). We stand amazed at the obstacles that he overcomes when he wants something. His determination and creativity will go a long ways some day. Out of all of our children, he has the most tender heart and shows the most remorse when in trouble. That is encouraging. He loves books and can play on his own for hours. In that way we have it really easy with him. He especially loves being with his little brother and tells everyone that his little brother is his friend. He adds a lot of zest to our lives with the mischievous glint in his eyes and his endearing smile.

His colourful character has been carefully crafted by God.  

                                      We have some teeth issues going on here!

focus on the family rediscovered

Last winter I rediscovered the Focus on the family Radio broadcasts. During the quiet, cold nights I would nurse our little newborn and listen to the day's broadcasts. It made for some cozy winter nights.
 This winter, our little guy has grown into a busy one year old and I have heaps of laundry around me as I listen (the difference that twelve months makes!) The broadcasts are wonderful! They are meant to make your family grow in God's way. The broadcasts equip, educate, and encourage your family.


I highly recommend listening to Part 1 and 2 on Thanksgiving Stories of gratefulness from listeners who called in to share. (November 2013) The Christmas Memories that aired were equally as good. (December 2013) Before the broadcasts, the hosts warn their listeners to have a tissue on hand. I am warning you to have a handful of tissues ready!


oneplace.com/ministries/focus-on-the-family

the new church library - part 2

 

Welcome to our new church library! When planning the new church building, the library was given a key location near the entrance of the church with extra big windows looking into the room. This glass window and door are great for drawing people in, and allows for a quick look to see if any of your missing children are in the library. Here is a picture of the drop off box that collects all of the returned books.


 

Each section of the library is clearly labeled.

We had a blank wall beside the door and this picture from etsy of the "fruits of the spirit" suits the spot.

The garden bench fit perfectly under the window.

We have lots of young, energetic readers in our church:)

In the middle of the library we have a big cubby. On one side we have bins for the wee little children books, along with a step stool, and a box for all of the books that need to be catalogued.

This is the other side of the cubby where we shelf the older children books.


Our library committee consists of five members from our church. The congregation is generous and we are budgeted for $2,800 per year for buying new books and DVDs. As for buying books, it has worked well within the committee to take care of the areas of our interests. I tend to buy the real life stories and biographies. The other committee members purchase Christian Counselling books, children's books and DVDs. We read blogs that recommend good, wholesome books that are edifying. Blogger Tim Challies posted a list of his top favourite books from 2013 and we had already bought seven out of the eight that he recommended. That confirmed to me that we were on the right track. We have audio CDs for all ages. Our DVDs deal mostly with Creation, but we also have tours through Israel, a series called "Dispatches from the Front" and much more. The DVDs have all been well received. We have a section of novels but have been careful not to buy non-fiction that is over the top. We are in charge of proof reading the books that we order. When I have a big box of books to go through I pass them out to others - usually my sisters and friends -  to proof read and I love their responses.They take this job very seriously and I love hearing their enthusiasm when they have just read a great book. I have had an elder come up to me and tell me that a senior that he visited wanted to do something useful for the church but felt limited. She loved reading so he asked me to send some books her way. I thought that that was a wonderful suggestion.
 I like to think that our library is well balanced in terms of what is allowed in the book shelves. A few months ago I came across a fantastic book that clearly showed God's working in this young man's life. The problem was that in a few parts it was explicit. Three different people read the book and they all expressed some doubt. Our library has an official policy and mandate but I summarize it by saying, "when in doubt - leave it out" and that seems to work just fine.
As far as how our committee runs, the two men on the committee take care of the computer and scanner. We do not send out renewal notices and forms to the congregation when there are over due books but we will from time to time put notices in the bulletin asking everyone to do a spring cleaning and return books so that other people can enjoy them as well. Our librarians sign out books and return books after the morning or afternoon service. They do this for a month at a time; twice a year.
We do not mind if there is a book dealing with something like addictions, or some other private matter that goes missing. This can be a personal, private issue, so as long as the "borrower" is reading it and is getting help, we will order another book. The committee members take turns writing a seasonal newsletter four times a year highlighting a topic or an author.
We have great resources so we are in the process of making a list available to the consistory members if they happen to come across a special case, they can find some help or recommend a book on that issue.
In a nutshell, this is how our library works and it is a very rewarding committee to be on. It is an absolute delight to hear a reader tell you that a certain book really impacted his or her life, encouraged them to grow in their Christian walk, or equipped them in an area of life. We are very thankful to our congregation and consistory for their support. That goes a long ways!